May 092012

Josh Hamilton is pretty good at this whole hitting a baseball thing

Hey Hamilton deserves to be on the $32 bill! That way he has left over dough after purchasing a gigantic wiener!

Last night, Josh Hamilton had one amazing night. Yep. Even by his lofty standards.

Now, a kick-ass night for Josh Hamilton is quite a good deal different than an excellent evening for most of us normal human beings.

Four home runs constitute a titanic Tuesday for the Hambone. For the rest of the world, the hallmark of a solid day is just one that, well, doesn’t suck.

For some, that means a hangover that goes away before you think you’re dying, coffee that isn’t that crappy, and a trip to the gas pump that only robs you of most of your money.

Sounds like a pretty solid day to me.

Besides, at least you have coffee to drink, gas to guzzle, and there is no tombstone that states: “And his final words were: ‘Dude, I think this hangover is going to kill me.’”

But no, for Hamilton to have a good—no, great day—he’s got to throw it in the normal man’s face…with his gigantic four dongs the only exclamation mark necessary to draw the eye to his truly titillating Tuesday…Alliteration! Come and get some!

Sure, four dongs—and of course they’re all long. Some guys get all the luck.

All kidding aside, even though I wasn’t kidding, Josh Hamilton’s night against the Baltimore Orioles was truly one for the ages.

5-5, with 8 RBI. 18 total bases. His batting average jumped 30 points—to .406. He now leads all of MLB in all three of the Triple Crown categories—.406, 14 HR, 36 RBI.

And Hamilton did all of that in just 5 plate appearances. A quick breakdown of the highlights:

18 total bases—that means that Hamilton ran 1,620 feet of which 1,440 feet were of the trotting variety. That’s over a quarter of a mile! If only cardio were that fun for me.

15 That’s how many players had hit 4 home runs in one game until last night. Unbelievable. To better grasp this, here are three names that NEVER hit 4 in one game: Babe Ruth. Barry Bonds. Tim Howell (okay, once I did hit out three during a home run derby on a little league field…whatever man, a 179 foot power alley is deeper than you think, and my last two I crushed.)

5 Number of home runs Hami has swatted in his last six at-bats. Whoa. He’s had 22 total bases over that span. Boston’s Kevin Youkillis has had 22 total bases all season long

Well, like all great statistical accomplishments, the best way to appreciate them, fully, is to compare them to, uh, comparable stats that suck…big time. So, here we go:

Josh Hamilton’s wonderful night versus Albert Pujols’ piece of shit season:

• Josh Hamilton’s 8 RBI last night are just 1 shy of Albert Pujols’ entire season total…Poo’s got nine, I wasn’t patient enough to wait out your mental calculations.
• Hamilton’s 18 total bases are 18 more than Pujols’ total bases from his 0-4 performance last night. (Note: I just came dangerously close to embedding an emoticon into this article. And yes, it would have been a smiley-faced one.)
• Hamilton hit four home runs in just over three hours. Given his current pace, Pujols will hit his fourth round tripper (which is shorter than a Hami dong but still a dinger) 363 at-bats from now. It will take significantly longer than 3 hours for Pujols to accomplish this.
• Albert Pujols has one more home run now than his gigantic and disturbing bronze statue.

Josh Hamilton is pretty good at this whole hitting a baseball thing

Yes, Albert Pujols' Bronze statue is only one home run shy of catching up with Captain Poo.

• Hamilton, rather than going with the bronze statue, decided to opt for brass balls.
• Albert Pujols should become a rapper. There are all kinds of words that rhyme with Pujols’ favorites—”ang” and “mang”—this would create a Poo Hole Flow of epic proportions…plus Poo’s penchant for ducking out of press interviews when things go wrong would add some serious street cred.
Okay, now it’s time to get off of Pujols.

‘Cuz he just got off of my Mom!!!

I don’t think I said that right.

Go Rangers!

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Mar 222012

The Baseball Do 2012 Field Trip

50 of us are going to meet up at Patty Shack Burgers to get the event started at 4:oopm, have some chow and then head over to the ballpark for a great game, followed by an awesome concert.  To top it all off, we’re giving you some Baseball Do swag!  Here’s what you get:

  • A ticket to see the Rangers host the Oakland A’s at the Ballpark on Saturday, June 30th
    • 6:15pm start – Lexus Club
    • Free Reckless Kelly postgame concert
  • A meal before the game at Patty Shack Burgers
    • Burger or Chicken Sandwich
    • Fries
    • Soft Drink or Tea
  • A Baseball Do “Nolan is my Homeboy” T-Shirt to wear to the game!

That’s a $60 value.  You get everything above for just $34.99!

Secure your spot for the Baseball Do Field Trip! Limited to the first 50!

The Baseball Do 2012 Field Trip
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Mar 202012

We’re excited to announce that Patty Shack Burgers is becoming an official sponsor of the Baseball Do Texas Rangers Blog & Podcast.  Kyle from Patty Shack, Jasen & myself are thrilled about the partnership and looking forward to some really fun events throughout the baseball season!

Patty Shack Burgers is truly NOT your ordinary burger, and if you haven’t been there yet, you’re missing out!

Conveniently located near the Rangers Ballpark, Patty Shack is the ultimate location for grabbing a burger and beer before heading to the park to watch some Rangers baseball.

Not going to the game?  No problem, Patty Shack’s atmosphere is perfect for watching the game with fellow Rangers fans while enjoying some tasty food and thirst quenching beverages!

Click on the ad below to visit their website for location, menu and contact information!

Patty Shack Burgers partners with Baseball Do

We are already planning our first event, which will consist of a ticket to a Rangers game, a meal a Patty Shack and some Baseball Do gear, so stay tuned as we plan to announce specific details in the coming days!  This will be a limited opportunity, so be sure to follow us on Twitter & Facebook so you don’t miss out!

For those that haven’t been there, here are some pics from inside Patty Shack that I snapped earlier today.  Believe me, the pictures don’t do it justice – awesome atmosphere!

Patty Shack Burgers partners with Baseball DoPatty Shack Burgers partners with Baseball Do

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Mar 172012

St. Patricks Day Ticket GiveawayBeing that Jasen and I are both full-blooded Irish (from the pant’s down if you know what I mean), we are in the giving mood on this fine (overcast) St. Patrick’s Day!

With that being said, we are giving away a pair of tickets to see the Rangers host the Mariners on Wednesday, April 11th at the Ballpark!

To be eligible, all you have to do is comment here with your favorite thing to do on St. Patrick’s Day.  We’ll accept entries through tomorrow night and announce the winners on the Monday Morning Fastball’s!

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Mar 082012

Welcome to the YuTim Howell 


Welcome to the Yu

On a crisp Wednesday afternoon in Peoria, Arizona, a certain right-hander made his much-anticipated spring training debut against an actual team, rather than teammates. 

As the San Diego Padres and Texas Rangers locked horns in front of over 200 media members, and at least that many spectators, you could certainly feel the buzz in the air (and through the Internet.)

Naturally, I’m speaking of former Texas Rangers’ pitching prospect, Joe Wieland.


Or as that weird corduroy-clad kid in fourth grade used to say: “No doy.”

Twenty years later and I’m still not sure what the heck that phrase means. It certainly makes spellcheck angry. 

I clearly recall offering that dude two chocolate snack packs for his dilapidated peanut butter and jelly sandwich—relishing as I reeled him in—only to scream “Psych!” at the last possible moment, nullifying the ludicrous potential transaction.

Anyways, you remember Joe Wieland.  He threw a no-hitter in his last start before being shipped to San Diego, which is Spanish for…well, you know.

Wieland—who, along with Robbie Erlin, was packaged in the deal that netted Mike Adams—worked the standard spring training load of two innings on Wednesday.

More like substandard.

His outing is best described by simply stating that, well; Jeff Suppan outpitched him.  Yep, that Jeff Suppan. The same one that languished in Triple-A for the Royals last season, never getting the call up to the bigs. Yep, those Royals.  When Bruce Chen is blocking your path to the show… So, Joe Wieland is why all the media were on hand in Peoria.  Duh.


Wieland was barely a bad peanut butter sandwich, whereas Darvish was easily the chocolate snack pack—all that, and maybe, just maybe, a bag of chips too.

Yes sir or madam, this day was all about the Yu, as in Darvish, not the Miami Hurricanes.

To understand Darvish’s excellent outing, you really need delve no deeper than his line:

IP: 2.0 H: 2 R: 0 ER:0 BB: 0 SO: 3 ERA: 0.00

But what fun is that?

Never have 36 pitches been so scrutinized.  It’s cliché, but now, dear Rangers fans, we can all bask in the glory of knowing what it’s like to have a true “rock star” type of player in our very own blues and reds.

No kidding, the hype surrounding Darvish has been so immeasurable that when I saw 157 light up after one of his pitches, I honestly thought it was in miles per hour rather than kilometers. 

Turns out, of course, that 157 KPH translates to approximately 141 MPH.  Or something like that. 

Anyways, over the aforementioned 36 tosses—all of which suspiciously came from the stretch position—26 were strikes, and only two fell for hits, both doubles. 

The hardest hit ball of Darvish’s outing came off the bat of Padres right fielder Will Venable.  The pitch, a fastball, was struck so soundly that it seemed destined to be the world’s first two-run, solo shot.

Alas, it wasn’t meant to be.  I mean, c’mon Venable, that’s Yu Darvish, main!

Venable’s blast hit the gigantic monolith in centerfield that members of the Japanese media were seen constructing prior to the game’s first pitch. Hey, they have retractable roofs, right? Why not retractable home run-stoppers?

Truth be told, Darvish’s outing was nothing short of spectacular.  Not only did he show off his wipeout slider and electric fastball, Darvish also made a very athletic play on a line drive up the middle in the second inning.

Using every inch of his 6’ 5” frame to snare the liner, Darvish astutely threw to catcher Yorvit Torrealba nailing what would have been the go-ahead run.

And yes, I realize this is just spring training.  And no, I’m not drinking my “Yu Darvish kool-aid.”  I am, however, contemplating dying my hair orange.

In summary, Joe Wieland is the real deal, folks.


For Texas Rangers’ fans, it’s all about the Yu.

No doy.

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Jan 102012
  • Tuesday Morning SlidersContract talks with the Dutch Oven are on hold for now according to an article posted by T.R. Sullivan on  Holland and the Rangers were discussing a 5-year deal.  Holland is one of many current Rangers that the club has been in contract (or contract extension) talks with as JD & Co. work towards keeping the nucleus of this team together.
  • The Great Eric Nadel has been named the 2011 Texas Sportscaster of the Year.  Here is a little Nadel Gold for you on this find Tuesday morning
  • Fan Fest is this weekend.  Are you going to be there?  Jasen and I are going (more than likely on Friday night), so comment below if you are going to make it and we’ll meet up for an awkward hug.
  • Barry Larkin is the sole inductee into the Baseball Hall of Fame for 2012 yesterday with 86.4% of the vote.  Hat’s off to a great baseball player and a classy dude.
  • Rafael Palmeiro got 12.6% of the vote. Clemens and Bonds will be on the ballot starting next year, so they will be the strongest litmus test to date for the players tied to the steroids scandal and will go a long way in determining if Raffy will ever stand a chance to get inducted.  Tim Kirkjian wrote a good article about the 2013 Hall of Fame eligibles.
  • Juan Gonzalez and Ruben Sierra will both fall off of the ballot after receiving under 5% of the vote.
  • Episode 6 of Baseball Do will be posted later this morning!
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Jan 092012
Monday Morning Fastballs
  • Peter Gammons wrote yesterday about the  Rangers as a team of interest in the Prince Fielder sweepstakes.  I’d love nothing more, but trust in JD and the front office to not put us in a compromising situation that hinders us from competing down the road.
  • Rangers linked to having interest in Brad Hawpe.  32 year-old left-handed hitting Fort Worth native has bounced around the last couple of years.  Assuming he would be primarily of interest as insurance against injury in the OF or to Mitch Moreland, as he can play both OF and 1B.
  • Numerous rumors arose over the weekend of the Rangers interest in RP Ryan Madson to fortify an already strong bullpen.  I’m a big Madson fan, so I’d love to see this happen as he would bring another late-inning shut-down pitcher into the mix.
  • The 2012 Hall of Fame results will be released today – Jayson Stark believes that Barry Larkin is a lock and I agree 100%.  Jack Morris, Jeff Bagwell, Tim Raines & Lee Smith should also make a good showing, and might possibly get the call this year as well.
  • If you missed it, I wrote an article about our current Rangers, and the possibility of some of them to receive the call from Cooperstown someday.  Click here to give it a read.
  • TEBOW!
  • Jorge Posada retiring – not going to rehash his entire career, but I think he’s in the same boat as Bernie Williams as far as Hall of Fame chances, if not even a little less likely.  He’s got the Yankee thing (aka “Rings”)  going for him and the fact that he was a catcher helps take a little focus off of his offensive statistics (catchers seem to get more leeway from Hall of Fame voters in regards to stats and career totals).
  • Angels agree to 4 year extension with Howie Kendrick.  Good player, but not worthy of the Best AL 2B Death Match that Jasen broke down a couple of weeks ago.
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Jan 072012

Is Nolan your Homeboy??Baseball Do T-Shirts are here!

We’ll be doing giveaways here on the site, as well as on both Twitter (@baseballdo) and Facebook (Baseball Do Facebook) over the next several weeks, so make sure you follow us and like us (sounds creepy).

Leave us a comment and let us know what you think of the shirt.


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Jan 032012

Will Cooperstown Call?Next Monday Cooperstown will be calling.

Calling upon it’s newest inductees to be forever enshrined in the Hall of Fame of our countries great past-time.  Here are just a few that are prime for consideration (need 75% of vote to get inducted):

  • Barry Larkin…very deserving and will probably get the nod; got 62% of vote in 2011.
  • Jeff Bagwell…he’d get my vote, but I wonder if the era he played in works against him; only got 42% of vote in 2011.
  • Jack Morris…13th year on the ballot for this big-game pitcher, with good (not great) career numbers; got 54% of vote in 2011
  • Lee Smith…478 career saves (was all-time leader for a few years); 10th year on ballot; got 45% of vote in 2011.
  • Tim Raines…transcendent player who changed the game with his speed; 38% of vote in 2011
  • Mark McGwire…Rafael Palmeiro…steroids.
  • Bernie Williams…1st year on the ballot for a great defensive center fielder that played for a dynasty.

There are others of course, but we don’t need to go any deeper than what’s above.  My guess would be that Larkin and Morris make it this year, with Bagwell and Raines improving their vote totals and Williams being the strongest of the newly eligible.

All of the debate over the players above got me thinking about our current Rangers team, and wondering if we had anyone on this team that had a legitimate shot at someday receiving the call from Cooperstown.  Here’s a look at four current Rangers whom you could build a solid argument on, based on achievement and/or potential.

  • Will Cooperstown Call?Michael Young – Mr. Ranger will be 35 during the 2012 season and has played in 11 seasons (not counting 2000 when he only played in 2 games), 9 of which have seen him play in 155 games or more.
    His career totals are  strong:

    1667 2061 169 917 87 0.304 0.350 0.451 0.801

    Accomplishments & Awards: 7 time All-Star, 2006 All-Star game MVP, 1 Batting Title (2005), 1 Gold Glove (2008), let the AL in hits twice (2005 & 2011), Twice finished in top 10 MVP voting.
    Assumption for projecting career: plays 6 more seasons (through Age 40), with playing time and production decreasing 5% per season starting in 2013, with a increased decline of 10% in his final season (at age 40).
    Career Projections:

    2509 3051 248 1358 127 0.299 0.346 0.443 0.789

    Again, this is pretty elementary approach to projecting out the remainder of a players career, as there are many factors that can come into play, but I think this is a fair approach.  If anything, you could probably argue that it’s not conservative enough.  I’m not going to attempt to project any additional accomplishments and awards for Michael or anyone below for that matter.
    Hall of Fame or Not: With the exception of Pete Rose (banned), Craig Biggio, Derek Jeter and our very own Rafael Palmeiro (none of the 3 are eligible yet), 3,000 career his is a lock for the Hall of Fame, so if Michael can produce at the level assumed above, I think he will one day get the call from Cooperstown.

  • Will Cooperstown Call?Josh Hamilton – Had Josh not been derailed by the demons that plagued him early in his professional career, this may be a no-brainer, but one could also argue that had Josh not faced and eventually overcome those demons, he might not be the player that he is today.
    Josh is 30 years old, with 5 big league seasons under his belt, only one in which he played in 135 games or more.
    Career totals:

    589 698 118 425 36 0.308 0.366 0.543 0.909

    Accomplishments & Awards:  4 Time All-Star, 2010 AL MVP, 2010 ALCS MVP, 2 Time Silver Slugger (2008 & 2010), 1 Batting Title (2010), Led AL in RBI (130 in 2008), and one hell of a life story that impacts anyone who knows about it.
    Assumption for projecting career: Plays 8 more seasons (through age 38), averaging 145 games per season through 2014 with playing time and productivity decreasing ~10% through remainder of career.
    Career projections:

    1604 1879 321 1168 86 0.307 0.358 0.543 0.901

    Hall of Fame or not: The numbers won’t do it alone.  What’s hard to project, especially with a player as skilled as Josh, is the what he might do as far as additional accomplishments and awards.  Josh could also exceed expectations as far as playing time and productivity, but his first five MLB seasons don’t back that up, so I’m not comfortable being more aggressive in these areas.  With all that said, I’m going to say that Josh won’t get the call, but there isn’t a guy on this team that I would rather see get in the Hall of Fame.  He means a lot more than stats and awards to a lot of people.

  • Will Cooperstown Call?Adrian Beltre – Adrian was playing at the Major League level at the age of 19.  I asked Jasen what he was doing when he was 19. and wasn’t surprised to find out that he wasn’t playing Major League baseball, but instead he was working at Oshmans Sporting Goods, sponging off his parents and spending a lot of “me” time.
    With an early arrival, comes more time to accumulate statistics.  Adrian has played 14 season in the majors with the Dogers, Mariners, Red Sox and Rangers.  He has played in 150 games or more in 7 of those seasons.  Here’s Adrian’s career stats :

    1959 2033 310 1113 114 0.276 0.329 0.469 0.797

    Accomplishments & Awards: 2 Time All-Star (2010 & 2011), 2nd in NL MVP voting in 2004, 3 Gold Gloves, 3 Silver Sluggers, Led AL in doubles in 2010 (49), let NL in HRs in 2004 (48).
    Assumption for projecting career: Plays 7 more seasons through age 39, averaging 145 games through 2013, with 5% decrease in playing time and production through age 39 (steeper decrease in production during final 2 seasons).
    Career projections:

    2851 2953 494 1717 126 0.271 0.317 0.468 0.787

    There is no way in hell that a 39 year-old Adrian Beltre would hang’em up just 47 hits away from 3,000 and 6 HR’s away from 500, so let’s put one more limited season at Age 40 on top of these projections.

    2909 3001 504 1748 126 0.270 0.316 0.466 0.782

    Hall of Fame or Not: No question, if Adrian can play to the level assumed above, he will be a lock for the Hall of Fame.  500 HRs doesn’t mean what it used to, but coupling that with 3,000 hits and any additional awards and accomplishments he can corral, and I think Adrian Beltre will get the call from Cooperstown in 2025 or sometime shortly thereafter.

  • Will Cooperstown Call?Elvis Andrus – Elvis Augusto Torres Andrus was born in 1988.  I won’t get into what Jasen was doing in 1988, but I was 12-year old in love with the game of baseball.  On August 26th, 1988, when Baby Elvis entered this world, the Texas Rangers were 20.5 games out of first in the AL West, looking up at the Bash Brothers.
    By far the shortest career and youngest of the four that we are examining here. You could argue that it’s ridiculous to even put Elvis in the conversation here, but I have to.  The idea for this article came about when my Dad and I were at a game in late-2010, and he asked me who on the field could ever become a Hall of Famer.  At the time, without digging into the stats, we agreed that Josh and Cliff Lee might have a chance if they remained highly productive for the next several years.  When also both agreed that Elvis, while very limited in experience and
    I’m not going to even bother with the numbers.  He’s only 23 years old with three major league seasons to his name.
    Elvis is smart and has the tools to become something very special.  He is one of those guys (like Josh) that can make the difficult plays look easy.
    Hall of Fame or Not:  He could be the next Edgar Renteria, Alan Trammell or possibly even Barry Larkin – or better or worse than any of these guys.  Elvis is smart and has the tools to become something very special.  He is one of those guys (like Josh) that can make the difficult plays look easy.  If I had to go out on limb, I’d have to say that I don’t think Elvis will get the call from Cooperstown, but that’s only because most don’t.  It’s reserved for the elite…the greats…the transcendent players that play at a level above their peers.  Could Elvis become this type of player?  No doubt.

So there you have it.  Apologies in advance if I left your favorite Rangers off the list.  Ian, Nellie, Nap and Neftali all crossed my mind to include here, but for various reasons, I don’t think they are quite ready to be part of the conversation.  I realize that by including Elvis, I might be opening myself up for a little criticism – feel free to leave a comment.  In the end, it’s about the team.  Awards and recognition are great, but its about winning the games and winning a Championship, and we should all be ecstatic with the fact that OUR team understands and embraces this.


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